Our Story
After losing our 12-year-old son to suicide, we decided to share our journey with others in the hopes that they might learn and grow.
Gabriel Chufamo Deely was born in Ethiopia and joined our family through adoption in 2006. One of five children, Gabriel was a happy, outgoing child who shared a bright smile with everyone around him.
On November 14, 2018, Gabe, just twelve years old and in seventh grade, came home from school seeming a bit tired and down. He shrugged it off saying he was going upstairs to do his homework. That was the last time we saw him alive. To say we were shocked by his death would be an understatement. At home, Gabriel never exhibited what we now know as “usual signs” of depression or someone at risk of harming himself. As we planned his funeral, we believed he must have been trying a prank or somehow harmed himself while goofing around.
Our naïveté was crushed when content from the iPad assigned to Gabriel at school (it never left school) was finally made available to us an anxious three weeks after being requested. Unlike the Chicago Police Department reports of benign searches on Gabriel’s home devices, we were horrified to read the report from the school device, which indicated that he had searched suicide, bullying, and inappropriate sexual content numerous times in the last 11 days he was alive. It was immediately evident that our son’s school device was not being monitored and that the firewalls were ineffective. No details were made available to us except the last 11 days that Gabe used the device.
Additional confirmation of Gabe’s suicidal intent, including a personal notebook, reports from his peers, and even a presentation given in class, showed that Gabe felt bullied, isolated and alone at school. He felt diminished, not good enough, and hopeless. He spoke of suicide to his classmates. Again, none of these signs were exhibited at home amongst our close family or shared prior to his passing.
Our family was shattered by the loss of our little spark plug. We are working to put our lives back together and choose to celebrate the way Gabriel lived, not to focus on the way he died. In Gabriel’s honor, and in honor of all youth lost to suicide, we share our journey and work diligently through Gabriel’s Light to prevent youth suicide through education, cyber safety, and kindness campaigns.
We celebrate Gabe’s life and work diligently in his honor, and for all those lost to suicide. We can’t realize our mission alone. Please join us in preventing youth suicide.